stopping bags?

Do you know what it’s like to stand in your kitchen baking cakes?

Or whatever Nicki was saying all those years ago when the industry wanted to replace her with someone who lacked the same passion.

Stopping bags? To think that someone would want to make it so I don’t get paid for the work that I’m doing is beyond me.

I had to be a little funny about it but the situation I’m in does not feel very funny. Uncomfortable? Yes. Serious? Yes. Dire? No, as I know it’s something I can get through. The territory is uncharted and the unknown can be scary.

Different departments at my job have hired my business, through our job, to cater for them. Most recently, I had an order for two dozen muffins which I delivered this Saturday. Ahead of this drop-off one of the women who works in that department had a nightmare that the CEO, my boss, came downstairs and yelled at her for hiring me and another co-worker for catering.

And I have been feeling this bad vibe from him ever since I presented my cakes a few weeks ago.

I blind sided him with the fact that I had a business. Which, I didn’t feel it was something I had to tell him and as time is going on, is something I don’t feel needs to be discussed further than “hey, I have a business.” Since then, we don’t speak much beyond work, which is fine, and the usual pleasantries have turned into questions about the business.

“Angel Confections, huh?”

“You know coconut is my favorite cake.”

“Can I have the friends and family discount?”

“Fifty dollars for a cake? Is that how much they cost?” “Well yes, I know you pay for quality.” “I pay retail.”

I’ve got such a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t want to keep going to people and trying to get them to understand the energy that I’m picking up on because I know I’m not crazy.

To be the boss for the past fifteen years, everyone moves when you move, whole calendars and thus lives revolve around you, now there is someone directly under you who is branching out and you don’t have a say in any of it. And I know he had plans for me to be his personal assistant after he retired. God’s plans for me and his plans for me differ, and I’m so grateful for that.

The undermining has began and really, there has been moments when he’s very outwardly angry, about the fact that I’m starting a business but makes it seem like it’s about work. Or, that my business is so taking up so much of my time that it’s causing me to fall short. Unsure if I’m allowed to make mistakes anymore.

It just feels like the beginning of the end.

Which’ll lead into a new beginning and so I’m doing my best to take it all in stride.