Ms. Pink and her pocketfuls of sunshine

I've been enjoying resting this weekend. I loved sleeping in so much I almost didn't leave the house today but you know what, I don't regret getting myself up and out. I felt sooooo pretty in pink. It's my color. No hot pink today but a nice light shade, very delicate. One of my friends, a coworker who listens to me while I vent and takes such a genuine interest in my creativity, invited me to her poetry book release. My focus has been on balance. Give and take. There are some friendships that I've had where I realized late in that I had taken too much. I have apologized and am happy to, going forward, make sure to show up for those I care for and celebrate them. Thinking I know it all, I got lost on the way over but did enjoy myself when I got there. She's Puerto Rican so I knew the food would be good and so would the music. There was a huge pan of was arroz con gandules but I'm not eating any pork so, I couldn't even taste anything besides jealousy. We listened to a few of her closest friends describe how much she meant to them as they read some of their poetry. There was so much emotion in the room, that was my favorite part.

Everything can't always be about me. I do kind of live in a world of "Ashanti," but I'm learning to bask in the joy as others experience it. Like I watched a friend do double-dutch for the first time and then the sun came from beyond the clouds and shined on her as she was laughing -- it was such a beautiful moment. More joy. I'm doing my best to find it in each day. Now, I did take some pretty photos. Somehow, back to me. Off the shoulder is really my vibe and so is pink glitter on the eyelids and collarbone.

I'm back to Real Housewives of Atlanta and I'm looking more deeply in than what is necessary. I'm just a forever curious woman. I say that to ask: how much should you share with your partner? Do you tell 100% of what is going on with your friends and their happenings? Part of me is like, you cannot share it all. Somethings should stay between me and you, as my friend and my sister. I find that the girls on this show go back and tell their husbands everything and I know couples do this during pillow talking, plus it's such an interesting part of the show. Because the men always bring it up in group settings chile... Or let's say you know your spouse is a hot head, is there a certain amount you can keep away? If I know you're the type to pop off quick -- I might hold somethings back until there is a right time, but is there ever a right time? Sheesh, I don't know. I just never want to put the person I care about in a position to get into any trouble.

They're so heavy on fashion labels on this show. A lot of people trying to keep up with the Joneses. All very fabulous and mansions and luxury cars and extravagant parties and ballers and shot-callers. Is my age showing? Ha. The focus is on finding a man with a lot of money, someone who will buy them all these things and take them on trips and lock him down immediately and and and but I find that they don't discuss love so much. Well girl do you love him? Why? What is it about him? Is selling your soul worth all the material possessions? I don't think stuff fills that space in your heart and I quite like stuff. My home is decorated so beautifully. But what about late at night? What about when you need to vent? What about when you want to share in some vulnerability? What about a good belly laugh? Where do you find your fulfilment? I'm not saying it has to be in another person but I don't think the possessions will ever be enough when you what you actually want is emotions from another.

Current fulfillment for me -- a cuddle with my teddy bear!

Some random thoughts:

I bought this new dot marker-by-number pad. It's so fun and since I can't scroll, a great way to kill time!

When throwing away well-used things, you can really feel the energy change in your space.

Everything ain't for everybody!

I think I need a pair of white jeans but I just know I'll get them dirty. And quickly.

What is my nervous tick when I'm lying or caught up? Watching these women has me thinking because I know I'm a bad liar. Thank you to the people who saw me struggling and let me get away with it chile.

Does magenta, teal and leopard print look good together?

There are some many little things that go into taking care of a home and I'm only renting -- imagine a home I own.

How much alone time is allowed on a couples vacay?

Would I even want so much?

Wishing on a star,

xoxo,

Ashanti