You, Me & My Ex
I love seeing the many sides of a person: the good, the bad, and the ugly. There’s so many ways to live life and I love seeing the possibilities — that’s probably why I’ve always been so consumed with reality shows. What makes people tick? How do they navigate their various personal relationships? How do our cultural differences play out? Watching for so many years has made me curious as to how future generations will perceive us, who we were and our problems as a whole, and I’m sure one way they’ll be able gauge an idea is through these shows. Now that I think about it, I would like a sociologist to write an article or at least a book about this topic.
After volunteering at the food pantry, which I’ve been loving lately, I spent the rest of the mid-afternoon until well into the night watching a TLC reality show entitled “Me, You, & My Ex.” Twists and turns, shock and awe is all I can say to describe the spectacle that was on my screen. I loved every moment of it! The show followed different relationships with one thing in common: one of the partners is still attached to their ex, usually under the guise of best-friendship.
One couple divorced nineteen years ago and the husband went on to marry another woman who he’s been with for eighteen. They hang out together all the time: the wife, the husband, his ex wife and his ex-wife’s fiancé of eight years (who is actually her husband but they kept it a secret this entire time). One of the most unique relationship dynamics I had ever seen. The husband and his ex-wife flirt, have long talks about the past, and the ex-wife, though she denies it, still has feelings for him. She even asked him would he have changed had they gotten back together.
Another couple divorced a few years ago after the wife cheated with a married neighbor while her husband was away in Japan on deployment. He found out about them being together after coming back home and seeing another man sitting in his home at the kitchen table. (The audacity! I would have lost my mind in that moment.) The wife is now married to the neighbor, best friends with the ex-husband she cheated on, and even best-friends with her new husband’s ex-wife. Absolute whiplash! The wife’s new husband plans to remarry her and she’s shocked as to why her ex-husband wouldn’t want to attend a ceremony dedicated to her and the man she cheated on him with.
A common thread began to appear in each of these scenarios — lingering romantic feelings. Would I say this is true for every person who is still friendly with an ex? No. Am I still giving it the side eye? Why yes, I am.
